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New Eyes ATLAS
I went outside 1:10 AM DEC 19 – I think this was 3I’s closest point to earth in my time zone. An hour or two beforehand, I was coughing, expanding, inflamed, whole dinner came up violently. I stepped outside at 1:10 AM, and there was a sudden giant gust of wind that came out of nowhere, then it stopped. Then suddenly again, then suddenly stopped. It was scary, like a scene in Stranger Things. Then it rained, suddenly. Then it stopped. I raised my arms, grateful, fully on board now.
I went back in, hit my pillow, spontaneously started praying to Jesus. It was like he was suddenly right behind me then, just there. I was grateful! And I knew all communication has seriously changed.
Below is 3I ATLAS yesterday near our earth, this astrophotographer and scientist, Ray, has been so devoted to photographing and gathering data. It’s beautiful and inspiring, and there is MUCH DATA collected from yesterday. More baffling events, energies hitting core of the earth, and even the spinning and rainbow colors are amazing!
This week is still a doozy, physically. Then, surprise, my life experience of being “cast out” came up, like a 6-12 year old kid come through the door out of nowhere….hurt, really hurt and mad, and running to the fridge every time she feels it. Family triggered some of it and walked me into it. Finally, I asked myself, “Who has not rejected, disliked, targeted me??” Sounds like self-pity. But it’s genuine and I don’t like the answer. I realize I can’t go back to the beginning, exactly. There is just an incredible long list, an outline even, the routine of not being accepted, not allowed, being pushed out, outcast. Seems like this should be potato chips now, so small meaningless at this point. But wow, the feeling is deep cup o’ hurtful. Hard and angry. When it arises, I jump up and go for food. Wild to watch myself do this! Sometimes I don’t and I’m like, “go ahead, whatever you want little girl!” Cuz I love her.
I had a colleague years ago in Education, phenomenal English teacher back in LA. Every great mind, great poet, great rockstar was on her walls. She had a word “Wa” on the wall, too. She would tell her students to trust the Wa. I went to her one day, after a week of too much social rejection, gossip, abuse (more than the usual) and I sat by her fish tank and cried. It was all I could do. She told me a story of this Vietnamese man who was the only person left in his village that had been burned to the ground. Everyone and all was gone. There was no point in trying to telling the soldiers what they had done. He just held his head in his hands and cried, for all of them. I keep thinking about that now.
Ass kicking week this week — uterus/ cramps, brain buzz/fog, fatigue, neck, lower back, major fatigue, wrong foods are dangerous. All I can think for now.
Still hurting, grieving that ghost cloak I wore for so long.
I love you 3I ATLAS for always. āØā I can see clearly now, the rain is gone.
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