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Dear Nicole, BLESS YOU and the wondrous storm YOU ARE❤️????!!! Alcoholism is my familial disease so I completely relate. Whatever you choose to do or to not do, BE TRUE to yourself and REMEMBER your freedom isn’t contingent upon your mom’s choices. When I read your words, what came to mind is a moment I shared with my niece who was just 22 years old at the time. Her dad/my brother drank himself to death several years ago. The first Christmas following his death she said: This is the BEST Christmas of my life because Dad isn’t sucking all the oxygen out of the house and me. Her ability to acknowledge the truth blew me away AND I knew it was only the beginning of her healing the wound. I think this particular moment came to mind reflecting the power of acknowledging ALLLLL that your mom’s alcoholism has cost you. And mothering yourself through whatever arises. What I KNOWWWW as a malnourished daughter of an alcoholic father and mentally unstable mother is the LOVE I had been waiting for had to be freed within ME!????